The Fly – flap
Ok now. I can hear you think. A fly flap and blogging, those things have nothing in common. Nothing. OK I guess you all need a little more information on this Fly – flapping thing.
Fly flap
The fly flap – as we know it – is a contraption, thought up maybe thousands of years ago out of necessity. People at that time didn’t have fridges to keep their food cool and this was the next best solution to keep the bugs away from their fresh butchered meat.
Later on, people found out, that is was also helpful in keeping flies and other bugs away from themselves. Sure, you can try to smack the fly with your hand, but those flies are faster than a rocket powered lawn mower. And those things go fast. Fly flaps are lightning fast. And leave red burning marks on your arms and / or shoulders.
Just imagine you being a fly, minding your own business, sitting on this bloody mass of meat at the butcher and – out of nowhere – this green swatter totally dismembers your six legs from your hairy body.
Your bodily fluids oozing over the meat. Your last act as a swattee for the swatter. Eat and die. No more merry meat eating moments.
Fly Flaps can also be used as a tool of terror. On little dogs for instance. You don’t want to actually hit him with it, but just by making a connection in the dog’s brain that makes the association bad behavior - flyflap – I’m a bad boy – is enough.
If you are consistent with the flyflap (action – reaction – result) just saying something like “Do I need to get the fly flap” is enough to let the little dog understand that he’s done something wrong.
Cesar Milan
How do I know all his (or think I do)? It’s all because of Cesar, that likable guy. I’m telling you, I don’t always agree with some of the methods he uses, but he gets results. Well… at least in his TV shows. I bet some of those miracles took more than one take to shoot. I do understand it’s just TV.
Cesar, he knows his way with dogs, but does he with people? I don’t know. There are ‘whisperers’ for just about anything. Dogs, cats, horses, skunks, just to name a few. Whadda ya know. Hereby I am opening a position for the ‘person whisperer’. Or ‘jerk whisperer’ or ‘asshole whisperer’. I guess you can come up with a few positions too, huh?
Just think about it. Wouldn’t it be nice sometimes to have one around the house?
Now you still have no clue what a fly flap and blogging have to do with each other. Let’s keep it that way.
Happy Fly Flapp’ing
// Jan
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I don’t remember getting that idea from Ceasar Milan but it sure works with the ‘devil dog’!! My sweet Doo…he’s such a good boy! xxx
I use a rolled up newspaper that I just have to show to Titan and he’ll haul ass. He’s never been hit with it. Not sure what the connection is, but it does work.
Brenda Lee recently posted: WHOA!! Jump back mo’ fo’!
I think that dogs feel the need to ‘please’ their ‘master’. So… if the master is unhappy, so he is…
Jan recently posted: The Fly – flap
A good smack with one of those can do wonders for adjusting attitudes.
Jack@TheJackB recently posted: The Story of My Life Told Via Music
Not just for dawgs, Jack!
Jan recently posted: The Fly – flap
My friend recommended him if I ever get a dog as family pet.
I have an electric fly swat thing though
Hi Colleen! Well, it sure works for them (and me). Hmmm.thinking how an electric flyflap would work on them… lol
i’m sitting here trying to think who i could use that thing on…annoying spammers? that would be a great name for a plugin. the fly flap…activate to swat the crap out of spammers. see it does have something to do with blogging
Well, personally I could think of a few thousand ways of using it… Playing air guitar, for instance. Oh and my blogs are always related to blogging in some weird way. Thanks for picking that up!
well i personally love the way you weirdly relate to blogging. your posts push people to think and finding the funny is easy
Aww.
. I’m a believer in the fact that funny sticks better to people’s minds…
Love those fly flaps – reminds me of my grandparents. They always had one around and they worked so well. Wonder if there is an electronic one for spammers?
Hah! There should be one for those ‘bugs’. If there is one I want an electrical one, 40,000 volts, 25 Amps. That should do the trick! Thanks, Lisa!